Table of Contents
Own Your Feelings
One of the biggest sources of stress in our lives comes from believing that other people “make” us feel a certain way. When we think someone else controls our emotions, we end up feeling powerless—like we’re just being pushed around by whatever happens to us. But the truth is, our feelings belong to us. And the more we learn to take ownership of them, the more confident and calm we become.
Here’s a simple exercise that can help you shift from “someone out there made me feel this way” to understanding what’s really happening on the inside.
Step 1: Write Down Your First Reactions
Think of a situation where someone upset you. Maybe a friend ignored your message. Maybe someone made a rude comment. Write down the first thing that comes to mind, even if it sounds dramatic or unfair. For example:
“He made me feel mad.”
“She hurt my feelings.”
“They made me feel embarrassed.”
These statements are super common—everyone says them. But they aren’t actually accurate.
Photo by Afif Ramdhasuma
Step 2: Rephrase Your Feelings Honestly
Now, rewrite those statements using a more truthful pattern:
“I felt mad when he said that.”
“I was hurt when she called me a name.”
“I felt embarrassed when they laughed at my idea.”
See the difference?
You’re not blaming the other person for creating your feelings—you’re noticing how you reacted to what happened. This shifts the power back to you.
A Simple Formula to Help
If you get stuck, use this fill-in-the-blank sentence:
When you ______(name the action), I feel______ (name the feeling)
When you ______, I felt ______.
When she ______, I felt ______.
This keeps things honest, calm, and focused on your real emotions.
Why This Matters
At first, changing the way you think about your feelings might feel weird or even uncomfortable. It can be scary to look directly at the emotions underneath—hurt, anger, embarrassment, disappointment. But with practice, this skill becomes one of the most powerful ways to understand your stressors and triggers.
When you can say, “I feel ___ when ___,” you’re no longer trapped by what other people do. You can react in clearer, healthier ways. You can choose your next step instead of feeling pushed into it.
Remember
Only you are in charge of your feelings—never give that power away.
When you own your emotions, you also own your strength.
Stress Factoid of the Week
Your phone’s accelerometer can detect stress. Don’t know what the accelerometer is? Watch this video for a brief explanation
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet. Id dicta repellendus ea omnis odit et modi similique ut odit adipisci et aperiam deserunt est nihil atque nam
Sapiente illum? Est accusantium error et dolor libero eos magni vero et odit voluptates et ullam consequatur ex exercitationem harum. Et reprehenderit voluptatem
A quae quia est rerum sunt eum nisi dolores est velit voluptatem non exercitationem consequatur id Quis ipsa. Sed autem fugit eos consequuntur
Tell Us What You Think
Let’s chat in the comments. What stood out to you?
Your comments are appreciated